Have you ever met some real gentlemen to the core…I’m talking about those who treated you like a lady and made you feel so special? Can you remember feeling valued and respected with the way some of them spoke to and related with you? I have also experienced the flip side. I have met some very mean and discourteous “un-gentlemen”, both in the world of work and socially, and I can vividly tell the difference.
There is a lot to gain in being a gentleman, especially when you are in the company of a lady; it may guarantee you a second date, because being a gentleman is never old fashioned and every lady would rather have the company of a gentleman. For the men folk, It is very important that you teach your son to be a gentleman from an early age. You should lead by example. Your son needs a role model. Display gentlemanliness at every opportunity so he can learn manners and respect directly from you. Help him see the importance of respecting and valuing people as he grows.
Statistics and life experiences have shown that it will be pretty difficult for the 21st century young boy to understand how to treat people right, if there is no deliberate tutoring and strategic example. Your son’s immediate environment, domestic and society are strong influencers of his character.
Without a deliberate teaching of character, thoughtfulness, kindness, respect and manners, your son will grow up not understanding how to be a gentleman and he stands the chance of becoming a discourteous adult.
Timeless tips to model to your sons:
- Treat yourself with respect and use your manners always. Treat everyone else with respect; the people you care about, the women, the elderly, the children, regardless of gender. Anyone breathing deserves to be valued and treated well. Be polite to people, considerate and always do things to build them up.
- Do not cease to support the people around you when the going gets tough, especially your loved ones. Life is not always a bed of roses, unexpected events happen to us and everyone can do with some handholding and assistance. Be compassionate, be sensitive and show concern for the wellbeing of others. A gentleman does not run away at these times of life.
- Be helpful. This is one sure sign of gentlemanliness. Always offer a helping hand whenever you can, to the people around you. Simple courteous gestures like keeping the door open for the person coming behind you, giving up your seat for the elderly and the lady, going out of your way to make the next person comfortable and valued, random acts of kindness, regardless of gender, all speak volumes about who you are.
- Keep your word. A gentleman follows through on whatever he says he will do. Be trustworthy.
- Let the ladies go first, and offer to carry the heavy items. Love and adore your wife. Do not mistreat her and do not be abusive towards a lady.
- Be appropriately dressed and well groomed at all times.
One of the greatest gifts you can receive is for someone to tell you how much of a gentleman your son is. However, you must model gentlemanliness. It will not happen by accident. You must teach the principles of character.
“A gentleman is someone who puts more into the world than he takes out” – George Bernard Shaw